How to support a client whose child is autistic or neurodivergent
- As a parent of an autistic child, life can be very different than you imagined it might be.
- You can spend so much time in day-to-day survival mode that you don’t always have the time and energy to plan for the future.
- Simple tasks feel complicated because you’re providing a high level of care for your child and family. And caring can be fulfilling but exhausting.
- As the family’s adviser, it’s hard to ‘get it’, and the family may not expect you to ‘get it’.
- But being empathically curious can help.
Here are a few ideas of things you can do and say to support your clients:
- Start a meeting by specifically asking how they are doing. Special Needs Parents spend a lot of time and energy focussing on their children and may not have much time for themselves. They will be very grateful for someone checking in on them.
- Drop them an email every now and again just to check in and see how things are going. They may not have time to respond, but they will are likely to appreciate the thought.
- Take the time to understand the SEND landscape. Check out what is in the news and take the time to ask if it’s affecting their family.
- If you come across helpful articles or websites or social media accounts let them know. They will appreciate you thinking about them and their family and you may offer a different perspective on things they hadn’t thought of before.
- Give them the option as to whether you talk about their children when you meet. “Would you like us to chat about how the boys are doing today or not?” Some days, SEND parents would rather keep things practical.
Psychologist, Dan Hughes, created the PACE approach to engaging and communicating better with children who struggle to regulate and express their feelings. P = playfulness. A = acceptance. C = curiousity. E = empathy. This formula can also be great to use with clients who have a lot going on emotionally in their lives.